Train Wreck
by knacc
Summary: Zer0 meets his fellow vault hunters. Accidental caring ensues. Prequel to Arm Repairs, Assassinations and Other Awkward Advances.


Zer0 stands in the corner of a train car and like he would in any situation, sizes up its other occupants. There is an AWOL Dahl soldier (no challenge there) and a small but sturdy looking man who he's sure would be easy to sneak up on just from how loud he breathes. There is also a fierce, statuesque woman who may or may not be an actual Siren. He's not sure if she's legit and if she is, what her special skill is but of all of those in the car, he looks forward to fighting with/against her the most.

On the other end of the worthy opponent spectrum is the teenage girl sitting next to her. He's not sure what a middle class girl from one of the inner planets is doing with an outer planet's style replacement arm but the awe and nerves he can read off her don't really scream seasoned fighter. She's spent most of the trip openly staring at each of other occupants in turn and when she stops fidgeting and starts talking to the theoretical Siren, she speaks loudly.

"Hey… uh hi, I'm Gaige. You are?"

Even sitting, the Siren is almost a head taller than Gaige so when she responds, she is forced to look down at her. "Maya," she says tilting her head slightly in what could be confusion.

"Maya," she repeats as if to commit it better to memory. "Nice to meet you. I don't mean to be nosy but are you-"

"A Siren? Yeah."

"Oh, I totally already guessed that. It's pretty obvious really. You have all the trademarks: blue tattoos, unearthly beauty," Gaige looks Maya up and down, "a body that will not quit-"

Maya folds her arms across her chest and leans away while the two other men chitter to themselves.

All of that is about what Zer0 expects but what he doesn't is the slight chuckle that escapes his lips as well. He glances around but no one seems to have heard him. Good.

Later on, when Zer0 is too far gone to save, he will realize that this moment and its one stupid laugh is what leads him to starting to notice things. Like that Gaige's hair looks nice when it catches the sun. Or that she really is kinda funny. Or that he likes her smile, especially when it's directed at him.

Gaige looks down at her lap and rubs the back of her head. "Sorry, I kinda have no filter when I'm nervous. What I was actually asking is if you're hungry? Cause I've got some snacks I'd be willing to share if you are." She turns to the rest of the car and continues, "I've got enough for everyone really." She holds out a zip lock bag filled with puppy chow, "Feel free to grab a handful if you want."

DAHL and Shorty exchange a confused look before the short one shrugs and walks over. He then sticks one big hand in the bag, pulls out a giant handful and shoves it all in his mouth. A few moments of loud chewing later and he says the first thing he's said since he got on the train, "That is awesome!"

Gaige laughs. "Thanks, I'll pass your compliments on to the chef if I ever get to talk to them again."

Maya peers into the bag before grabbing a few pieces and eating them one at a time. "Chocolate and peanut butter?" she says, cocking her head to the side.

"Yeah of course," Gaige says before turning to stare at her, "Wait, have you never had puppy chow before? That is an absolute travesty if I've ever heard one."

"Let's just say I didn't grow up around much junk food," Maya says as she plucks a few more pieces out of the bag.

With that, DAHL finally strides over and grabs himself a handful, saying, "Military wasn't so big on tasty homemade snacks either so it's been awhile." He eats his whole serving at once.

Everyone but Zer0 is happily snacking on the possibly poisoned treats and idolly chatting when Gaige looks right at him and shouts, "Hey! You are more than welcome to come have some too, Mr. Mysterious. Minimum actual human contact is required, I promise."

Zer0 sighs. "Not interested/ I do not require food/ Thanks for the offer."

"What do you mean 'you don't eat'?" the soldier asks at the same time Gaige says, "Wait, does that mean you're a robot?"

Zer0 considers if either question is even worth responding to when Maya stops counting syllables and adds, "Was that a haiku?" to his list of options.

He decides to answer with a simple, "Yes," while emoting a smile and leave them to guess at which question he was answering.

It's hours later, after everyone's finished off the bag of puppy chow and wandered back to their respective corners, that he finally figures out why Gaige has a cheap-looking metal arm. Hyperion robots are filling the car and everyone is pulling out their tricks when suddenly, there in the middle of the ungainly yellow monstrosities is another very different looking robot. It appears as if it might be made of scraps but it also glides around the battlefield, tearing holes in the weaker robots with its giant metal claws like it is nothing. "Hell yeah," Gaige shouts right after the scrap robot lands a particularly good blow on one of the Loaders. And with that, all the pieces of her puzzle lock into place. She must have built that robot herself, he thinks, and she keeps it digistructed away in her arm. Clever.

He doesn't really spend much time thinking about it though before the rush of the battle sweeps him away. He manages to takes note of the siren's powers (very real and very deadly just like he thought), the soldier's turret (annoying but not unexpected) and the small man's skill for dual wielding (inaccurate but strangely effective) all while slicing and dicing through the weak forces Hyperion sent to deal with them. He has to admit, they all seem like pretty good fighters, no challenge for him (except for the siren) but worthy allies at the very least.

One short fight later and they are all standing together over the corpses of weak men and fractured robot parts. They all agree silently to open the door to the next car and there behind it is a decoy of Handsome Jack and mounds and mounds of explosives. He barely has time to take it all in before they go off and he's being thrown through the air. In the seconds before he passes out, two thoughts pass through his head. One: that there is no way he's letting something as amateurish and blunt as explosives kill him and Two: that literally everyone in that car was between him and the blast which both increases his chances for survival and makes him slightly displeased for some reason he can't quite grasp. All he knows is that when he wakes up surrounded, not by four corpses but by 5 living people (the siren vouches for the deranged-looking new arrival), he feels a small smile curl his lips.


End file.
